Have you ever felt like you have been pushed up against a wall and there is no escape? Sometimes life takes an unexpected turn or the inevitable happens and you have to face the music, but you don’t have the resilience to deal with it. Our jobs or relationships can become frustrating and disappointing and there is no solution other than picking your poison. You saw the writing on the wall a long time ago. Someone crossed a line, but you felt the way you handled it was weak or questionable.
You reevaluate the situation and anger forces you to take a harder look. After negotiating with yourself about momentarily feeling helpless and frustrated, you know something has to change. You go over it again and again until you realize you need to talk to someone about it. First, a few people come to mind immediately, but it’s too personal or embarrassing to talk to anyone about it. You reach deeper for that one person you can go to that will give good advice but going to them with the problem will reveal something about you or your life that isn’t worth the consequences.
After all, we have a reputation to protect. We care about what other people will think. The risk of exposure isn’t worth the relief that might come and you remember that you rarely agree with solutions others give you anyway. You feel the wall at your back, and the frustration is worsening because the problem seems bigger as you fail with indecision.
Seeing a therapist about it seems extreme but you have been preoccupied with your failing. Therapy, friends or clergy are out of the question because going to anyone and talking about it hurts and makes you angry. The days go by while the thoughts don’t. You have to see the scene where it all happened because it was in your home or job site. Or worse it occurred in public and you struggle with who saw what bothers you the most.
The process of denial starts as you put together your public rendition of what is happening to you. People are starting to notice you aren’t yourself. You might have to say something, but what? You know the same circumstances could happen again because it’s impossible to avoid it. You must do something, but you take it on the chin. Maybe it’s easier just to act like it’s nothing. Perhaps you’re overreacting.
What you do or don’t do is an action. The decisions you make and action you take will have consequences. Over time we are all living in a pool of impact. Making choices is all about seeing your options. The way you think has gotten you where you are now. Your attitude and beliefs are a process that evolves with wisdom.
I make it easier to chose your poison at TelepsyOnline. Seeing a psychologist who has a blog and online practice makes it easier to pick. Reading my blog will familiarize you with principles and purpose. You will find a solution that guarantees anonymity and confidentiality. Relief is just a click away.
Dr. Robert Marselle earned his doctorate degree in psychology (Psy.D.) from Ryokan College in Los Angeles and his Masters in Counseling Psychology from La Jolla University. He is a licensed clinical psychologist and a Registered Nurse (RN) in the state of California and is a certified TeleMental Health Provider by the TeleMental Health Institute, TMHI.